Song Description

A response to the issue that got W. Bush in the governor's house and on to the presidency. Ann Richards wouldn't vote for a concealed handgun law, W. said he would, so the NRA got him in the governor's house. And so on. But little reactionary ladies over Texas breathed a big sigh of relief that the status quo, rampant paranoia and ignorance, stayed intact. Yay!

Lyrics

I got me a pretty little gun baby
I got me a pretty little gun.
It?s semi automatic and semi democratic
Almost everybody?s got one
But mine is the cutest
I?m the sharpest shootist
I got me a pretty little gun

I got it for my birthday in my seventeenth year
Daddy said it?d help me a lot
And I never got dumped or talked dirty too
Cause the boys knew I was a good shot
And when I got married
Guess what I carried
In the bodice of my bridal gown?
That?s right I had my gun
Cause who knows if my honey
Might have turned tail and maybe left town?

Got me a pretty little gun baby
Got me a pretty little gun
It?s semi-automatic and semi democratic
Almost everyone in Texas got one
But mine is the cutest
I?m the sharpest shootist
Got me a pretty little gun.

Now all through my life
Never used a pocket knife
Never took karate or kung fu
I have always relied on this piece at my side
And the kindness of strangers like you.
And I won?t take it well
If you tell me I can?t use it
If I need it at the drop of a hat
What?ll happen if I need it
In a barroom someday
Or to mediate a neighborhood spat?

(Instrumental)


Now I know the NRA gets a lot of heat today
Bout all the gun violence going round
But if you watch Charlton Heston on that infomercial
You know we gotta stand our ground.
Cause who knows when the feds
Will try to control us
Even more than they already do?
They?re gonna send in U.N. troops
And know-it-all yankees
And Californians too!

So get you a pretty little gun baby
Get you a pretty little gun
Get an automatic
It?s real democratic
Everybody can get one
But mine is the cutest
I?m the sharpest shootist
Got me a pretty little thirty-eight
Pearl handled,
Leather holstered,
Eight barreled
shiny little pretty little gun. Bang bang!