Lyrics

My Guru?s Back in Town
By Winston Montgomery


Intro:
He?s done his time, 15 to life
He stole my money and he stole my wife
But he still says he can redeem my life
My guru?s back in town

Verse 1
Got an email the other day
Causing me considerable dismay
Saying my old guru was back in town

I first met him in the summer of love
Panhandling with a baseball glove
He had a long, flowing robe and an iguana on his head

His eyes had an other worldly gleam
Could have been red wine or thorazine
I had hoped I?d never again see him around
But my guru?s back in town

Verse 2
He said his name was Baba Do Run Run
And my wife and I could have lots of fun
Chasing our bliss all day long

Some would say we were mighty naïve
But we decided to join his family
And we followed him up to an old Victorian on Delmar St.

He told my wife and I and the other recruits
To strip right down to our birthday suits
With a movie camera he followed us around
My guru?s back in town

Verse 3
He fed us dog food from a bowl
Told us materialism was bad for our soul
So he took all our cash, check books, and jewelry

In the frig he kept a tray of sugar cubes
And no wonder we were all so confused
Because he had us take two lumps every morning in our Gravy Train

One night my wife just disappeared
And maybe it?s true she volunteered
I found her meditating on his lap without a sound
My Guru?s back in town

Chorus
My guru?s back in town
My guru?s back in town

Verse 4
We tried to escape, but he kept the doors locked
He couldn?t lose any of his holy flock
Cause the space ship would be landing any day

But then Baba was busted and the family dispersed
By the FBI hunting Patty Hearst
And he was sent to San Quentin to do a little work on his karma

Now he?s done his time and he?s on the prowl
And I hope he?s not psychic after all
Cause I?m trying to hide myself where I can?t be found
Because my Guru?s back in town

Verse 5
Suddenly there was a knock on the door
And a voice said, ?You know who I?m looking for,
And you?ve only got a few lessons left ?til spiritual enlightenment.?

His beard was long and mostly grey
His hair was thick but it looked like a toupee
And under his arm he was carrying a gigantic bong

He said, ?Brother, I just wanted you to know,
My services are covered by an HMO
So all that money nonsense is a thing of the past.?

So now I?m back on my spiritual quest
And Baba is as proper as ?Father Knows Best?
And with his teachings I?ve come to know
I should have fought for his release years ago

Outro
My guru?s back in town
My guru?s back in town
My guru?s back in town
My guru?s back in town