Song Description

Daddy's a catastrophe

Lyrics

"Daddy's in the Shed (And the Shed's on Fire)"
By Yves Stilmant © 2025

Verse 1A
Daddy said, "I'll fix the mower today"
Four hours later, there's smoke and flames
He rigged a still with duct tape and pride
Now the shed's glowin' red on the countryside

Verse 1B
Granny screamed, "You dang ol' fool!"
While Grandpa's yellin' "This is Biden's rule!"
The chickens fled, the cat caught fire
And Daddy's in there yellin', "It's just a dryer!"

Pre-Chorus
We got chaos blowin' through the yard
And Aunt Jean's prayin' to a mason jar
The neighbors called, the preacher came
But Daddy swears he's got it "tamed"

Chorus
Daddy's in the shed and the shed's on fire
Says, "I got this," standin' in the pyre
Granny's throwin' buckets with a bad back twist
Grandpa's screamin' 'bout a government list
Smoke's risin' up to the satellite dish
And the dog just barfed in the goldfish
If this ain't love, then it's pure desire--
Daddy's in the shed, and the shed's on fire

Verse 2A
He built it with scrap from a trampoline
A grill, three fans, and a washing machine
He said, "It's efficient and mostly legal"
Now we're one spark short of a barnyard sequel

Verse 2B
Granny's in curlers with a garden hose
Yellin' "Shut your trap, you half-baked doze!"
Grandpa's tryin' to lasso the flames
While Daddy's roastin' wieners, playin' games

Pre-Chorus
The fireman showed, but turned back fast
Said, "Ain't no way we're fightin' that gas"
Mama lit a candle for the Lord
Then threw her sandal and nailed the door

Chorus
Daddy's in the shed and the shed's on fire
Singin' Skynyrd like a gospel choir
The moonshine's boilin', the roof caved in
And Granny's chuckin' pans from the kitchen bin
The kids got marshmallows, the goat's inspired
Now the rooster's crowin' like he just got hired
It's a family picnic meets funeral pyre--
Daddy's in the shed, and the shed's on fire

Bridge (spoken & sung)
(SPOKEN:)
Gramps: "This here's a government weapon test!"
Granny: "It's YOU who married that mess!"
(SUNG:)
He's still inside with a garden rake
And half a pie on a paper plate

Final Chorus
Daddy's in the shed and the shed's still flamin'
But he's got moonshine, and he ain't complainin'
The fire truck left, said "Y'all are nuts"
While Daddy's holdin' beer and peanut M&Ms in cups
If chaos had a zip code sign
Ours would be burnin' just fine
So if you smell smoke and hear a choir--
Daddy's in the shed... and the dang thing's on fire ??

Tag (crowd chant):
"He's in the shed! It's burnin' bright!
Still grillin' burgers in the middle of the night!" ??