Lyrics

THAT'S LIFE IN THE BIG HONKY TONK
(THE BALLAD OF BUBBA, BOBBIE SUE AND TINY)
words and music by William Kitchens and Randy K Brown

WELL HIS NAME WAS JOHN, BUT EVERYONE CALLED HIM BUBBA. WHY, NO ONE KNEW
BUT HE HURRIED HOME FROM HIS JOB DOWN AT ROBERT LEE'S ACE HARDWARE WHERE HE SOLD ASSORTED NUTS BOLTS AND SCREWS. TONIGHT WAS GONNA BE SPECIAL. HE WAS GONNA ASK HIS SWEETIE PIE TO MARRY HIM. HAD HIS BROOKS AND DUNN ORANGE FLAME SHIRT ALL PRESSED AND STARCHED UP RIGHT. HE WAS GONNA HAVE THE BAND PLAY UM A SPECIAL SONG. AH THAT'D BE THE ICING ON THE CAKE AND BOY HE COULDN'T WAIT.

WELL AS BUBBA RACED THAT OLD CHEVY PICK UM UP OUT THE DRIVE OF HIS MAMA'S SINGLE WIDE EVERY BUG LIGHT IN THE TRAILER PARK CAME ON. HE WAS GONE. WHY THAT OLD 350
V-8 HAD HEATED UP THE HOOD LIKE A WAFFLE HOUSE GRILL ON A FRIDAY NIGHT BY THE TIME BUBBA FOUND HIS FAVORITE PARKING SPOT OUT BEHIND THE HONKY TONK. RIGHT OUT UNDERNEATH THE BUSTED POLE LIGHT HIS BEST FRIEND JIMMY WAYNE SHOT OUT TWO YEARS AGO SHOWING OFF HIS NEW 30 OTT. IF HIS SWEET HEART TURNED HIM DOWN, WELL HE MIGHT STILL GET LUCKY.

THAT'S LIFE IN THE BIG HONKY TONK

WELL HER NAME WAS JANE, BUT EVERYONE CALLED HER BOBBIE SUE. WHY, NO ONE KNEW
BUT SHE FLEW HOME FROM HER JOB DOWN AT MARY JO'S BIG HAIR AND NAIL EMPORIUM WHERE SHE WORKED AS THE SHAMPOO GIRL. SHE'D WAITED ALL HER LIFE FOR TONIGHT. SHE WENT AND HAD HER ROOTS DYED, A MANICURE AND A PEDICURE. MARY JO EVEN FILED DOWN THE CORNS OFF BOTH HER BIG TOES. HAD THAT HAIR ALL FIXED UP... WHY SHE LOOKED LIKE DOLLY PARTON DRESSED UP FOR SUNDAY GO TO MEETING.

WELL BOBBIE SUE HAD HEARD FROM BECKY LYNN WHOSE MOTHER N' LAWS SISTERS HUSBAND
WHO MANAGED THE WAL-MART OVER ON THE COUNTY LINE THAT BUBBA HAD PICKED UP THE ENGAGEMENT SET THAT HE HAD HAD ON LAYAWAY... JUST TODAY. AND ON THE WAY TO THE HONKY TONK THAT EVENING WHY SHE MADE UP HER MIND THAT EVEN THOUGH BUBBA HAD NOT ASKED HER TO MARRY HIM ON MONTEL WILLIAMS OR RIKI LAKE IN FRONT OF A NATIONAL TELEVISION AUDIENCE LIKE SHE'D DREAMED ABOUT.. WHY SHE WAS GONNA SAY YES ANYWAY

THAT'S LIFE IN THE BIG HONKY TONK

WELL HE WEIGHED OVER 300 POUNDS BUT EVERYONE CALLED HIM TINY. WHY.... WHO WROTE THIS SCRIPT.. ANYWAY HIS JOB HERE AT THE HONKY TONK WAS A KEEPING THE PEACE EVEN IF IT MEANT BUSTING UP A HEAD OR TWO. AND HE LIKED IT ALL....RIGHT. WELL WHEN HE HEARD ABOUT BUBBA AND BOBBIE SUE'S PENDING WEDDING VOWS HIS HEART JUST ABOUT BROKE.
HE'D ALWAYS HAD A SOFT SPOT FOR BOBBIE SUE. WHY SHE WAS LIKE A SISTER TO HIM, EVEN THOUGH SHE WAS HIS COUSIN... AND BUBBA'S TOO?

WELL TINY BEING AS HIS HE WAS ABOUT AS DIM AS AND OLD NEON BEER SIGN GOT HIS DANDER ALL FLUFFED UP AND SUCH WHEN THE BAND MADE THE ANNOUNCEMENT FOR BUBBA AND BOBBIE SUE TO COMMENCE TO DANCING TO THEIR REQUESTED DEDICATED FAVORITE SPECIAL SONG. WHAT HAPPENED NEXT WAS... WELL ...BOUND TO HAPPEN. AFTER 17 MINUTES AND 36 SECONDS OF FREEBIRD TO BE EXACT TINY HAD HAD ALL HE COULD STAND. HE REACHED DOWN IN HIS BOOT, PULLED OUT HIS SMITH AND WESSON, LOOKED BUBBA RIGHT IN THE EYE AND SHOT.... THE BAND LEADER DEAD.

THAT'S LIFE IN THE BIG HONKY TONK

(C) I Love My Babies Music, ASCAP and Randy K Brown, BMI