Story Behind The Song

When I wrote this song I was dealing with the loss of my kidney function and still having a very difficult time with it. I came to the chorus first, which to me sounds like a child accepting a punishment of sorts...'I don't wanna! but if i have to... well then ok'. The song shows my determination to make the most of life while I'm still here - and although I still stumble and fall, the future holds better things.

Song Description

The song deals with one's own sense of mortality. We are given the choice to learn from our experiences or make the same mistakes over and over again. Accepting that you have made a mistake though is very difficult. The song is also about reclaiming a time in your life when you thought you were doing just a little bit better, and trying to put yourself back in that moment so that while still accepting your mortality, you can move on and make the most of life while you're still experiencing it.