"Patricia Luce Chapman is a traditional Country lover's DREAM."
[Continuation of "General Comments":
You may use that, ignore that, or rewrite it yourself, but there is improvement to be made in this chorus. My intent was just to show you how much more powerful it could be if you held back your hook until the very last line of the chorus. That's where it has punch.
One other thing that I need to suggest to you. Until you have had your song critiqued by me or one of the other people here at Broadjam, or other industry professionals, preferably more than one, I believe that you are wasting your money on demos. These demos sound very professional. They have to have cost you money. But, IMHO, they were not ready for demo. If you send a guitar/voice demo, which will cost you nowhere near as much, it is not as painful to have to make musical changes later on. The rule of thumb is to have at least 5 people that you are not acquainted with tell you that the song is incredibly good and ask you to play it again for them immediately. Then, and only then, do you spend money on a high-class demo.
Patricia, I wouldn't have taken this much time and been as particular with you if I didn't believe that you have what it takes to do something in this business. I hope you take what I say here in the spirit it is intended to be taken.
Keep writing. Don't give up. I'm in your corner.
great song--i would like to hear this song on any radio station--cheers---joe.