Story Behind The Song

My daughter loves dogs, but wanted to know why they pick up bad habits like digging in the garden, eating shoes, etc. A few hours of work yielded this musical answer.

Song Description

Bluesy (country?) novelty song about being a dog who just can't help being a dog. Male vocal over acoustic string band accompaniment.

Lyrics

Bad Dog

To tell the truth I?m misunderstood
Never had a thing against doing good
But when I see a full moon, I can?t stop howling
Or a tasty little poodle, I can?t keep from growling

I?m a bad dog and I can?t change
Ain?t no ointment for this kind of mange
If it itches I scratch, if it tickles I kick
If it smells I sniff, if it?s nasty I lick
Cause I?m a bad, bad dog.

I once caught a fat Siamese cat?oh boy
Gave it a nice Chinese name?chew toy
But just because I chase squirrels and cats and cars
That?s no reason to put me behind these bars

I spent a year of hard time here in this pen
And you know in dog years, that?s seven to ten
But I?m bustin? out and it sure is a crime
So many hydrants so little time

Cause I?m a bad dog and I can?t change
Ain?t no ointment for this kind of mange
If it itches I scratch, if it tickles I kick
If it smells I sniff, if it?s nasty I lick
Cause I?m a bad, bad dog.

I might fetch your slippers and bring them to you
But they?ll be covered with slobber and a little chewed too
I don?t roll over or shake or sit
Don?t know how those other mutts put up with that stuff

I once took a try at obedience school
But I must have broken some cardinal rule
While the other dogs were learnin? to sit up and beg
I was getting acquainted with the instructor?s leg

Bad dog! And I can?t change
Ain?t no ointment for this kind of mange
If it itches I scratch, if it tickles I kick
If it smells I sniff, if it?s nasty I lick
Cause I?m a bad, bad dog.

© Greg Beattie 2004