Story Behind The Song

Peggy and I wrote this song and it has been perforemd by Bette Midler and Patti Lupone as well as by dozens of Cabaret performers all over the world.

Song Description

A funny send-up of the famous Edith Piaf Je Ne Regret Rien, as well as My Way and other songs in which the singer claims to have no regrets. This one seems more universal.

Lyrics

I Regret Everything
© Bill Burnett & Peggy Sarlin

I've lived my own life
win or lose
No one every called the shots for me
I put myself into these shoes
And no one every tied the knots for me
Life's a banquet
So I ate
Piled experience
On my plate
Grabbed life's gleaming golden cup and drank it down
Bottoms up
So proudly no I turn and face the crowd
And sing my feelings very loud
I REGRET EVERYTHING!
Every moment of my life
Every step that I take is another big mistake
I REGRET EVERYTHING!
There is nothing I've done right
Summer Winter Fall or Spring
I REGRET EVERYTHING!
The one good man
That got away
My acting in the high school play
That time at lunch I dropped my tray
My history of tooth decay
The love I gave one reckless night
The pants I bought that were too tight
That time I ran the traffic light
The Chinese food I ate last night
Burp...pardon
I REGRET EVERYTHING!
Every single thing I've done
Every path that I choose
Only leads to more boo boos
I REGRET EVERYTHING!
Look my stocking has a run
And I'm plagued by static cling
And my bathtub has a ring
And my bell has no ding ding
I REGRET EVERYTHING!
Everybody!
I REGRET EVERYTHING!
Every moment of my life
Every path that I take
Is another big mistake
I REGRET EVERYTHING!
Left or right I'm always wrong
I regret to have to sing
I regret having sung this song
Oh now I've depressed you
I shouldn't have come