Story Behind The Song

A friend (the late, great, Rod Phelps) told me that his doctor actually told him that his current osteo-problems were the result of his youthful, sexual adventures. Of course, I then wrote this song.

Song Description

The imagined recreation of an alleged situation - involving my friend, Rod Phelps.

Lyrics

I have a friend who's had a rough time
He's been laid up for a month or three
First it was his hip, then it was his back
And finally, they replaced his knee
He asked his doctor
What is the matter?
Why have my joints become such wrecks?
The doctor chuckled, shook his head
And said "You can blame it on sex"

You can blame it on sex
That's what caused these effects
It's not a curse or a hex
Just blame it on sex.

My friend was astounded and a little amused
At the news that his doctor spread
"You mean my condition is
The result of contortions
that I managed so long ago in bed?
The doctor laughed
Looked him in the eye
Saying: That's exactly what I said

Chorus

He said: I know that you were a young man once
Because you're sure are an old man now
So, I'm glad you had fun when you had the chance
Because it's all over for you and how!

Now, as you can guess my friend is having trouble,
Deciding on how to think of this all
On the one hand he still feels like a sack of shit
On the other hand, he had a ball
For my perspective, I must admit
That there are far worse ways to go
It's not that he was hurtin' from counting beans
Or playing tic-tac-toe

He can blame it on sex
That's what caused these effects
It's not a curse or a hex
Just blame it on sex.