Lyrics

Souvenir Demi Garamond and Benguiat Bold
All the other serf fonts
Leave me out in the cold
Officina Ramona and Trajan you're alright too
Helvetica, helvetica
I'm coming back to you

I will hunt you down and kill you if I find you're using Comic Sans
I will stamp it on your forehead
Meet my demands

Papyrus Clarendon , zapf dingbats and Logotype bauhaus
Grandma made a website
Please help her make it right
She used a font with caps lock on
Script style all upper case
The bandwidth can't take it
There's Le Griff all over the place

Chorus

A Fox Valley Billboard shows a hot tub
A couple with wine
But the Copperplate Bold phone number
doesn't look so fine
I'd rather see an ad hand painted with the baseline askew
Your Brush Scripted urinal ad
Made me piss on my shoe

Chorus