Lyrics

Ring, Ring, Ring
I'm sick of calling
I've been here on hold for hours and its quite clear that no one is listening, ing, ing
Ink on paper
Find me dictating a letter to the Better Business Bureau
Here's the thing
I'm old, not dumb
And I got better things to do
And companies these days don't really treat you like they used to

I've got a way out
I'll write the editor
Don't need a payout
That's not my style

Sixteen calls and not a single one went through
Anne had had a plan in place since 1932
USA Today you'll pay for what you put her through
Paid 19.95 to subscribe
Where were you?

You, you, you
Useless numbers on a collect call to Corporate
With a robot woman mocking me
It's too, too, true
I'm tired of trying
And her cold indifference tells me there's no point in even talking
Déjà vu
I'm old, not dumb
So don't repeat me, put me through
But companies these days don't really treat you like they used to

I've a way out
Letter to the Editor
Don't need a payout
That's not my style

Sixteen calls and not a single one went through
Anne had had a plan in place since 1932
USA Today you'll pay for what you put her through
Paid 19.95 to subscribe
Where were you?

Sixteen calls and not a single one went through
Anne had had a plan in place since 1932
USA Today you'll pay for what you put her through
Paid 19.95 to subscribe
Where were you?

'Ann Zerbel likes newspapers. In her 86 years she or her family has subscribed to four of them -- including, for about 80 years, this one.

You'd think newspapers would seek to return the love. In the case of USA Today, you'd be wrong.

"I made 16 calls," she said. "I finally gave up in December. ... Nothing has ever happened. I (just) wanted the paper."'
-- Rickert, Chris. "SOS: Not USA Today, or tomorrow, or next week, or next month for Waunakee reader." Wisconsin State Journal Apr. 2018.

Don't need a payout
That's not my style

Sixteen calls and not a single one went through
Anne had had a plan in place since 1932
USA Today you'll pay for what you put her through
Paid 19.95 to subscribe
Where were you?

Sixteen calls and not a single one went through
Anne had had a plan in place since 1932
USA Today you'll pay for what you put her through
Paid 19.95 to subscribe
Where were you?